It thrills us and torments us. It controls our thoughts, destroys our lives, and it’s all we live for. Yet we almost never speak of it. And as a buried force in our lives, desire remains largely unexplored—until now. Over the past eight years, journalist Lisa Taddeo has driven across the country six times to embed herself with ordinary women from different regions and backgrounds. The result, Three Women, is the deepest nonfiction portrait of desire ever written and one of the most anticipated books of the year.
We begin in suburban Indiana with Lina, a homemaker and mother of two whose marriage, after a decade, has lost its passion. She passes her days cooking and cleaning for a man who refuses to kiss her on the mouth, protesting that “the sensation offends” him. To Lina’s horror, even her marriage counselor says her husband’s position is valid. Starved for affection, Lina battles daily panic attacks. When she reconnects with an old flame through social media, she embarks on an affair that quickly becomes all-consuming.
In North Dakota we meet Maggie, a seventeen-year-old high school student who finds a confidant in her handsome, married English teacher. By Maggie’s account, supportive nightly texts and phone calls evolve into a clandestine physical relationship, with plans to skip school on her eighteenth birthday and make love all day; instead, he breaks up with her on the morning he turns thirty. A few years later, Maggie has no degree, no career, and no dreams to live for. When she learns that this man has been named North Dakota’s Teacher of the Year, she steps forward with her story—and is met with disbelief by former schoolmates and the jury that hears her case. The trial will turn their quiet community upside down.
Finally, in an exclusive enclave of the Northeast, we meet Sloane—a gorgeous, successful, and refined restaurant owner—who is happily married to a man who likes to watch her have sex with other men and women. He picks out partners for her alone or for a threesome, and she ensures that everyone’s needs are satisfied. For years, Sloane has been asking herself where her husband’s desire ends and hers begins. One day, they invite a new man into their bed—but he brings a secret with him that will finally force Sloane to confront the uneven power dynamics that fuel their lifestyle.
Based on years of immersive reporting, and told with astonishing frankness and immediacy, Three Women is a groundbreaking portrait of erotic longing in today’s America, exposing the fragility, complexity, and inequality of female desire with unprecedented depth and emotional power. It is both a feat of journalism and a triumph of storytelling, brimming with nuance and empathy, that introduces us to three unforgettable women—and one remarkable writer—whose experiences remind us that we are not alone. (less)
Hardcover, 320 pages
Published July 9th 2019 by Avid Reader Press / Simon Schuster
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Kate Yes, they are. And that is only one of my many issues with it.
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What even is this book? Broadly, it follows the desires and sex lives of three women but... it feels like a novelization more than reportage. Ten years of following these women went into this book but the author seems more concerned with transcription than any sort of thoughtful analysis. She draws no significant conclusions on the nature of women’s desires. Also, the title could be “Three White Women,” as all three women chronicled here are white. There is nothing wrong with that but it is such ...more

Audiobook... read by Tara Lynne Barr, Marin Ireland, Mena Suvari, and Lisa Taddeo
I’ve listened to 3 hours so far - of the 11 hours and 24 minutes.
Dave Eggers said:
“I can’t imagine a scenario where this isn’t one of the more important - and breathlessly debated - books of the year”. đŸ¤”
Well... let the debates begin!!! I don’t feel this book is worth the praise it’s getting - at all.
My thoughts so far....
Honest thoughts?
I think very little of it!!
The concept might have been a great idea....
But ...more
I’ve listened to 3 hours so far - of the 11 hours and 24 minutes.
Dave Eggers said:
“I can’t imagine a scenario where this isn’t one of the more important - and breathlessly debated - books of the year”. đŸ¤”
Well... let the debates begin!!! I don’t feel this book is worth the praise it’s getting - at all.
My thoughts so far....
Honest thoughts?
I think very little of it!!
The concept might have been a great idea....
But ...more

This is quite a perplexing book as I'm not sure what Taddeo's intentions were. She takes three American women and tells their stories of failed love, disappointing marriages, unmet or unfulfilled sexual and emotional needs.
In some ways the stories are different and, almost deliberately (?) echo themes covered in recent fiction: Lina, in a sexless marriage, falls into an affair with her high-school boyfriend; Maggie is 'groomed' into a sexual relationship with her high-school teacher; Sloane fin ...more
In some ways the stories are different and, almost deliberately (?) echo themes covered in recent fiction: Lina, in a sexless marriage, falls into an affair with her high-school boyfriend; Maggie is 'groomed' into a sexual relationship with her high-school teacher; Sloane fin ...more

“If you have a husband who barely touches you. If you have a husband who touches you too much, who grabs your hand and puts it on his penis when you’re trying to read about electric fences for golden retrievers. If you have a husband who plays video games more than he touches your arm. If you have a husband who eats the bun off your plate when you’ve left it but you aren’t one hundred percent done with it. If you don’t have a husband at all. If your husband died. If your wife died. If your wife ...more

“Three Women” is an intense look at the lives of 3 women, delving into their lives over an 8 year period, where they have been interviewed in their home towns. It intrigued me as it was an intimate look at their thoughts and desires, rather like reading someone’s diary.
The 3 women live in different areas, are different ages and social classes, yet they still have the same desires and hopes for the future.
I couldn’t help love Maggie, Sloanne and Lina and even though they chose paths that I would ...more
The 3 women live in different areas, are different ages and social classes, yet they still have the same desires and hopes for the future.
I couldn’t help love Maggie, Sloanne and Lina and even though they chose paths that I would ...more

This was an interesting one... The product of more than a decade of research and interviews, this book tells the stories of three women: Maggie, a North Dakota woman who, as a teenager, had an affair with her high school English teacher; Lina, a Midwestern housewife stuck in a sexless marriage; and Sloane, a glamorous Newport restaurateur whose husband likes to watch her sleep with other people. Provocative, explicit, and refreshingly frank, Three Women seems to be perfectly timed for our curren ...more

I appreciate how this book tackles the topic of female desire explicitly, given how female sexuality is so often stigmatized in contemporary culture. However, several issues got in the way of me enjoying the book or connecting with it more. As my friend Caroline writes in her astute review, I found aspects of the book gender essentialist, such that Lisa Taddeo would make comments about women’s desires broadly, without really analyzing how those desires may stem from socialization or how they may ...more

Jul 01, 2019Book of the Month added it
"Why I love it"
by Lisa Taddeo
Recently over drinks I asked a friend, “What’s the last book you read that you just couldn’t put down?” Without hesitation, she answered, Three Women. Now, I’m not usually a nonfiction reader—and I have a stack of half-read memoirs to prove it—but with this book, I have to agree with my friend: Three Women sucks you in from the very first page. After all, who would pass up a voyeuristic glimpse behind the bedroom doors (or in some cases, the classroom or car doors) o ...more
by Lisa Taddeo
Recently over drinks I asked a friend, “What’s the last book you read that you just couldn’t put down?” Without hesitation, she answered, Three Women. Now, I’m not usually a nonfiction reader—and I have a stack of half-read memoirs to prove it—but with this book, I have to agree with my friend: Three Women sucks you in from the very first page. After all, who would pass up a voyeuristic glimpse behind the bedroom doors (or in some cases, the classroom or car doors) o ...more

I did find the stories interesting to read, but I have a myriad of issues with the book.
1. This book is marketed as a book about women's sexual desires, but of the three women's stories, only Lina's is about her "sexual desire." Maggie's story is about how she was groomed by her male teacher, and Sloane's is about how she has sex with other men because her husband likes it, even if she doesn't like or find those men attractive. Those two stories aren't about women's sexual desires; they're about ...more
1. This book is marketed as a book about women's sexual desires, but of the three women's stories, only Lina's is about her "sexual desire." Maggie's story is about how she was groomed by her male teacher, and Sloane's is about how she has sex with other men because her husband likes it, even if she doesn't like or find those men attractive. Those two stories aren't about women's sexual desires; they're about ...more

Intriguing idea, a book about female desire, but this book is not about that. At all.

It's taken me a few days to get my thoughts together to write what I hope is a usual review. I want to start by saying I think this book is worth reading. It’s bringing about important discussions, I’ve had some really great ones with a few bookstagram friends but I also think it’s important to have the right expectations going in. ⠀⠀
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I was excited to read what had been buzzed about as a juicy expose on female desire. This book has been marketed as the next great feminist book based on 8 years o ...more
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I was excited to read what had been buzzed about as a juicy expose on female desire. This book has been marketed as the next great feminist book based on 8 years o ...more

Jun 28, 2019Bryn Greenwood added it
Reviewed for The Washington Post, to be published July 9, 2019.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/entert...
https://www.washingtonpost.com/entert...

Three Women tells the story of female desire, not as experienced by all women, but by Lina, Maggie, and Sloane. The stories of these women are surprising and thought-provoking, and Lisa Taddeo relates them in a book that is as insightful as it is impossible to put down. It isn't that these three women speak for all women, but that they speak so clearly, honestly, and powerfully for themselves.

"Sex is everybody's home, but nobody's address." -- Manisha Charak
I'm not sure what initially drew me to select Lisa Taddeo's Three Womenfrom the library's new release shelf, but I think that this book has similarities to Gay Talese's earlier groundbreaking 1981 non-fiction hit Thy Neighbor's Wife (which has long been on my GR 'favorites' list). Taddeo and Talese both obviously have investigative journalism experience pulsing strongly through their veins.
Taddeo's voyeuristic work focuses on thr ...more
I'm not sure what initially drew me to select Lisa Taddeo's Three Womenfrom the library's new release shelf, but I think that this book has similarities to Gay Talese's earlier groundbreaking 1981 non-fiction hit Thy Neighbor's Wife (which has long been on my GR 'favorites' list). Taddeo and Talese both obviously have investigative journalism experience pulsing strongly through their veins.
Taddeo's voyeuristic work focuses on thr ...more

Oof. This BOOK. Three women; eight years; their love and sex and desires meticulously recorded, celebrated, foregrounded. It is, almost unbelievably, nonfiction that – in the very truest sense – reads like a novel; Lisa Taddeo gives her subjects the care and complete focus that we often only give to the people we’ve made up.
The three women she chooses are Maggie, who has an affair with her high school English teacher at fifteen, and at twenty-three decides to seek justice; Lina, who marries the ...more
The three women she chooses are Maggie, who has an affair with her high school English teacher at fifteen, and at twenty-three decides to seek justice; Lina, who marries the ...more

I have no idea how to rate this book. On one hand, "Three Women" is a fascinating tale — but I wouldn't call it an accurate depiction of female desire, as it's being billed. To me, it is a sad tragedy about sexual dysfunction — not about sex as it should be. It is pornographic — at times, even more pornographic than I thought necessary. However that didn't surprise me, considering the fact that the book sought to lift the veil on "desire." I would love to read a book about healthy sexuality. Sad ...more

If you read narrative non-fiction you simply have to read this. You’re going to want to put down whatever you’re reading and get this instead. Lina, Maggie and Sloane and all their desires, obsessions, contradictions, hopes and disappointments are rendered with such compassion and dignity. The achievements of this book will floor you. To Lina, Maggie and Sloane, I see you, I understand you, I believe you. To Lisa Taddeo, I am in awe of you.

It's the nuances of desire that hold the truth of who we are at our rawest moments. I set out to register the heat and sting of female want so that men and other women might more easily comprehend before they condemn. Because it's the quotidian moments of our lives that will go on forever, that will tell us who we were, who our neighbors and our mothers were, when we were too diligent in thinking they were nothing like us. This is the story of three women.
Three Women is an odd little book: Aut ...more

4.5
'People in towns like Lina's think people are good people if they're not cheating, if they are not leaving home. Lina is having a mental breakdown because nobody cares. Nobody died, so nobody cares. She feels that she's suffocating. She has these three children she has to keep alive day in, day out, and if anything happened to them she would die, but at the same time, they are weights. She feels alone in caring for them. She feels alone in caring for herself. She wishes she could stop caring ...more
'People in towns like Lina's think people are good people if they're not cheating, if they are not leaving home. Lina is having a mental breakdown because nobody cares. Nobody died, so nobody cares. She feels that she's suffocating. She has these three children she has to keep alive day in, day out, and if anything happened to them she would die, but at the same time, they are weights. She feels alone in caring for them. She feels alone in caring for herself. She wishes she could stop caring ...more

DNF-ing at 34% because this book is making me feel incredibly angry. The fact that I wasn't going to like it was pretty apparent from the beginning, as the prologue reeks of victim-blaming: Lisa Taddeo describes how her mother was followed to work for a long time by a man who masturbated in plain sight while looking at her, and wonders why her mother "let that happen". She goes on to ask herself if maybe her mother secretly enjoyed the experience. If you need an explanation of why this is fucked ...more

Three Women follows - somewhat unsurprisingly - three women in contemporary America: Maggie had a relationship with her teacher when at school and is now at the trial to see whether he will be convicted, Lina is in an unhappy marriage and turns back to the one man in her life who ever satisfied her sexually, Sloane lives to fulfil the sexual whims of her husband who likes to watch her sleep with other men. The reader gets to know these women over the course of the book, which I took to be anythi ...more

Unpopular opinion time!
This has been one of the most hyped, talked about books of the summer. The topic was one outside of my general area of interest, but so much advance praise has been heaped on this book that I felt compelled to try it. Unfortunately, the book fell far short of the hype for me.
I’ll start by saying that I was impressed by Taddeo’s writing and the ambitious scope of the project. I also applaud the women profiled for their courage in sharing their stories. But none of that ta ...more
This has been one of the most hyped, talked about books of the summer. The topic was one outside of my general area of interest, but so much advance praise has been heaped on this book that I felt compelled to try it. Unfortunately, the book fell far short of the hype for me.
I’ll start by saying that I was impressed by Taddeo’s writing and the ambitious scope of the project. I also applaud the women profiled for their courage in sharing their stories. But none of that ta ...more

Before I share my thoughts on this, please know I don’t do so lightly and my comments in no way pass judgment on the experiences shared by the women.
I had two key issues with this book - firstly the writing, specifically the use of imagery and metaphor, is some of the most jarringly awkward I have come across. More importantly though, I think there are some major issues with the way that this book is pitched as being about “desire” more broadly. The majority of the experiences shared in this foc ...more
I had two key issues with this book - firstly the writing, specifically the use of imagery and metaphor, is some of the most jarringly awkward I have come across. More importantly though, I think there are some major issues with the way that this book is pitched as being about “desire” more broadly. The majority of the experiences shared in this foc ...more

This was a hard read for me, because I am an ordinary woman and I only know ordinary women. Lisa Taddeo talks a lot about how hard she had to look to find these women. “Lisa Taddeo crisscrossed the United States countless times, moved to six different places, and talked to hundreds of men and women to ultimately find three women whose lives tell the story of desire in America”. Her quote says it all. “This is about the extraordinary”. That’s true it’s not about real women like us. But a great fa ...more

Three Women is a true story based on the sex lives of three American women gained through a decade of vigilant reporting. Readers follows three women as they are faced with different challenges and issues within their sex lives. It is an intimate look at female desire in all its complexities.
Taddeo’s writing style mirrors that of a stream of consciousness technique. This style allows for Three Women to read as fiction as readers explore almost all aspects of these women’s lives. I enjoyed the n ...more
Taddeo’s writing style mirrors that of a stream of consciousness technique. This style allows for Three Women to read as fiction as readers explore almost all aspects of these women’s lives. I enjoyed the n ...more

4.5 stars
I’m so grateful I had the opportunity to read this book. It received high praise from Dolly Alderton and that woman never disappoints with her recommendations. So, I requested it on a whim and oh my god, what a book.
Three Women comprises unrelated stories about the lives of well, 3 women. Having written this over the course of eight years, flying across the country to interview the women in their hometowns, Taddeo zooms in on the chaotic truths of their sexual desires with unflinching ...more
I’m so grateful I had the opportunity to read this book. It received high praise from Dolly Alderton and that woman never disappoints with her recommendations. So, I requested it on a whim and oh my god, what a book.
Three Women comprises unrelated stories about the lives of well, 3 women. Having written this over the course of eight years, flying across the country to interview the women in their hometowns, Taddeo zooms in on the chaotic truths of their sexual desires with unflinching ...more

As I finished this book, I began plotting a murder. A murder of a rapist who pursued, manipulated and sexually assaulted a teenage (minor) girl during her senior year of high school--and got away with it. Reading Maggie Wilken's story through the words of Lisa Taddeo was maybe the best, most clear-cut case of gaslighting I've ever seen splayed out in print. It made me so angry that even though I finished reading the book around 11pm last night, I didn't (and couldn't) fall asleep until 1am. Can ...more
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“Look at me. I put this war paint on, but underneath I’m scarred and scared and horny and tired and love you.” — 11 likes
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